Are you allowing that tiny offense you received from someone to grow in your heart?

It's 1.30am now, and I really have to come record this testimony down tonight, or rather, a time like that in the wee hours. Haha.

For the past few days, 2 things happened to me, 2 persons said somethings that offended me, initially. But then, I told myself that because of my love for them, I shall not have any hurt feelings inside of me. All because I love them for who they are and I will forgive them even if they're unaware that they've offended me! (:

But days passed, and although I told myself that I have forgiven them, the images of them making those comments and the facial expressions that seem to be condemning me, kept flashing in my mind! I did not realized that I haven't really forgiven them, and that, the offense kept in my heart, or the grudge that I hold against them, was unknowingly growing inside of me.

And then, just now, I was reading John Bevere's book, The Bait Of Satan.

Praise God! Thank God! He spoke to me through this book.

He said that, I was loving in a very selfish way. I am not practising unconditional love, but selfish love. Selfish love such that, in my case, I was easily disappointed and offended by the remarks of the people whom I love dearly (: He said that I shouldn't have been offended! Because if I have learned to love them unconditionally, then I would give them every right to hurt me anytime.

I was loving selfishly, for I expected them to meet the expectations I have of them.

Indeed, the higher your expectations, the greater you'll fall.

In most cases, when it's people-to-people relationships, that saying would usually apply mostly to the people whom you love a lot. But many a times, we do not realise that, this saying, is a saying of practising selfish love. So what do people usually see from this saying? The standard reply would usually be, don't set your expectations too high then!

NOT SO.

We shouldn't even set expectations to the people whom we love! We should stop practising selfish love and start embodying unconditional love! Unconditional love that will not expect anything in return every time you give!

For every giving I offer, it will be a blessing for others! And not as if they owe me, and should return to me every time I give to them.

I have contacted 1 of them, and have asked for her forgiveness for holding that offense in my heart! (: The other hasn't replied.

I just want to praise the Lord and thank God for enlightening me and teaching me once again! I have understood Your word and I will use the grace You have given me to put it into actions, all for Your glory!

Love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who use you and persecute you

Nothing's Gonna Hold Me Back!

Holding Nothing Back

Yes! God's love is great!

I really am very grateful and thankful for being chosen to be a follower of Christ.

I am changed forever! I am free! I am no longer a slave to sins!

Because You died for our sins, You redeemed us, You purchased us, You shed your blood for us!

I am really very thankful, how undeserving I am to receive all these from You! How so blessed to be loved by You!

Your love keeps me going, Your love fills my heart and because of Your love, I have made a decision that will last for eternity!

I am still not perfect! But because of Your love, my goal in life is to live like You! To do all things in Your name, to glorify You!

I'm alive to live for You!

John 3:16

For God so loved the world, that He sent His one and only son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

I am Changed.

After so long, I'm finally going to start blogging again.

Many many things happened, bad things. I actually ignored this blog, and created a new one, to express all my anger, hatred and blame I have towards the world. But nevertheless, it happened like more than a year ago. Then I lost the ability to express myself. I couldn't find the right words to speak. I changed, evil overtook me. Evil took my words away, causing me to build walls around myself, containing and allowing all the bitterness to grow inside of me! So because I was so run down, I ignored blogging because I thought I would never find the right words to say again.

Also, After so long, I just want to say, I am changed, forever!

Because God changed me! :D * LONG STORY *

Today I was preparing the materials for my first time leading in the worship time for my cell, and I thought, what should I pray for? Then 'troubled hearts' came to my mind. And I asked God, how should I pray for the troubled hearts? So then I sang through the songs that are going be used for worship and I knew what I should pray for, but somehow, I couldn't put it into words.

So I asked the Lord to give me some scriptures to use in my prayer for the troubled hearts, so that He can use me to touch them and to refresh them again (:

God never fail to answer my prayers when it's according to His will. I took out my Holy Bible and I revised what I read yesterday, and sure enough, there were a few scriptures that spoke to me! Thank the Lord! ^^

Whatever it is, I know this abrupt post about my new life in Christ may come as a surprise or a shock to many. You can say that I'm crazy or you can say that I'm imagining things.

But my reply will be the same to all, I will never blame you for thinking that way at all, I will forgive you. Because I know, all the things that happened to me couldn't have been coincidences. I have so many testimonies, God touched me in so many special ways. You may not know what I've experienced, and you may not know how much I changed. But I just want to say, I am saved because I believe!

WHATEVER! It is (: I am very very very thankful, very very very grateful, to be able to believe in You.

- Living a life as a Christian is not easy, but living a life without christ is harder.